Getting ready

I spent part of the day getting ready for the holiday. My youngest son came home for the weekend and we’re all getting together on Sunday.

But leave it to me to get ready at the last moment. That’s my life. My boys used to hate it when I’d get ready for a show because I’d do so many things right at the deadline, usually the night before the show. They want me to have it done at least a week beforehand. So, when I actually found my rhythm and started getting things done earlier, it came as a shock. In fact, my younger son, who really hated my last minute antics, once came to me the night before a show and asked what all I needed done. He couldn’t believe it when I said, “Nothing.” He might still be in a little shock over that.

I’m still not great at getting things done early. I wish I could be someone who has everything planned out and is ready a week in advance. That’s just not me.

Not that I was in a rush today either. The streets were packed with people rushing around, no patience. I just moved along not feeling panicked about anything. I realized at the first store I went to today that I wouldn’t be able to get it all done, so I stopped worrying about it. I don’t seek “the perfect holiday” either. For me, about sharing time with my family over everything else. I’m someone who does too much and is probably a bit of a workaholic. The holidays give me a reason to stop and just enjoy some time with my family to do things with them that they enjoy.

I’m trying to let some of that come into my everyday too, like our bike-to-breakfast. It’s hard sometimes, but I know that my biggest regret is not spending more time with my children. Granted, I know that some days I was just in survival mode trying to make sure that I was holding it together as a single mom, but I still could have done better. I am probably being too hard on myself, but I still feel like I lost a lot of time with them.

So, I’m enjoying the time and knowing that it doesn’t have to be perfect because no matter what it will be. I will be there with my boys and there’s no where else I’d rather be.